Advice for Gals: Valentines Day
I?ve already given guys some advice on Valentines? Day. A friend suggested that I do the same for women. I?ll try to do my best.
Her you go ladies, step one for dealing with your male on Valentines? Day. Well in advance of the actual holiday, at least a week if possible, you need to drop some very clear clues about what you want. You will have to judge for yourself how subtle to make the clues, but I warn you not to be too subtle.
You see, in general men aren?t all that good at subtle. Since women are a mystery to us anyway if you do or say anything subtle we just get more confused. It?s not that we aren?t paying attention to you; it?s that we just don?t get it. You have to meet us a little more than half way and be blatant.
To start with, make sure to tell your guy what you don?t want. The best way to do this is through a complaint about an anonymous other guy. Say something like, ?My friend was telling me about that her husband gave her X last year for Valentines? Day. Can you believe he would do something so stupid? She divorced him and took all his stuff and he has to live in a box under the bridge now. His parents won?t even talk to him. I?m glad you aren?t stupid enough to get X for me.? You may need to mention X a few more times to make sure it sinks in. Doing this will attach negative emotions to the procurement of X and you won?t have to worry about it. It?s sort of like rubbing his nose in it to teach him a lesson.
The other part is the positive reinforcement associated with what you do want him to do. The science people say that males bond through doing whereas females bond through talking. Let?s say that you want a specific scenario for Valentines? Day. You would tell your man, ?You what would be really cool to do together that night? It would be really cool if we would do this and that and the other.? You just list off all the things that sound good to you.
You have to repeat this scenario a couple of time and be very specific about the gifts you want and the ones you do not want. Tell him that the results of doing things properly results in your being more affectionate toward him and a willingness to do other stuff with him later. The other stuff doesn?t have to be sex; it can be sporting events or camping or something else retarded.
Another positive reinforcement technique involves male posturing. Even though we no longer live in caves, there is a caveman in almost all men. This caveman wants to be the dominant male in his territory. Even if he really doesn?t want to be with all the women he still wants all the women to want him. All you have to do is tie a good Valentines? Day scenario to a better standing.
You could say to your man something like, ?If you did something like that, I couldn?t tell all my girlfriends because then they would all be after you. They always complain that their men never do anything that good.? He would be tempted to do it just to be the big man. It works even better if you can tell him one of the better men in your circle is planning to do something almost as good. The spirit of competition will compel him to action.
You see, Valentines? Day, or any romantic occasion, can be made much better when you realize that we males are clueless and that women are ultimately responsible for tricking us into behaving. If it weren?t for the influence of you gals, we would just go around drinking and clubbing things with sticks.